jack&butters: April 2008

has been back for a few weeks but i guess i just have not blogged about it. well, come to think about it, i have not blogged about much latley. I have been busy with school and doing hair and nannying for the cutest baby ever. And I have been waiting to hear from chapman which has been like the longest wait ever. when i first applied i told myself i wasnt going to tell anyone because i was trying a semester early and that if i didnt get in then i would just not say anything and wait to apply next semester when i have 60 units.. but of course its been too hard not to say anything and now pretty much everyone knows. i always worry that i will be excited about something and then if i fail everyone will know and i will be 10,000 times more dissapointed.. but what i have come to find is that fail or succeed its so much more fun to let people onto the journey with you. and its ok, if say.. zak has to lay in bed with me as i cry and drool all over his shoulder. haha ew. anyway, i guess what im trying to say is that i am trying to change my ways a bit and actually be positive and excited about things instead of hoping for the worst and then being pleasantly happy if stuff works out. its just not as fun that way. weird, this blog started out about baseball. but in a way it kind of holds th same value for both. when you go to a game you dont sit there thinking they are going to lose and then cheer and give golf claps if they end up winning in the end. you (or atleast i) go dressed in your best team spirit garb, eat a hot dog, and cheer your heart out for the team you love (go padres!) because win or lose, half the fun is being in the moment and experiencing it as its happening. at the end of the season winning even one game over half can get you into the play offs. so its ok to lose some. its ok to lose a lot. you just have to keep on going and keep on fighting. and not give up because you have a couple bad series to the dodgers. ah, how profound my love is for baseball... and how much i learn from those $15 cheap seats high at the top of the stadium.